THE LABURNUM TOP -- TED HUGHES

 The poet is trying to convey the message that life is a process of exchange and transformation. People are alive because they undergo exchange of energy. The laburnum top symbolizes the pattern of our life in general, which is dull and inanimate. The goldfinch breaks her usual pattern and make it lively. The goldfinch transforms the tree and make it alive, without the goldfinch and the chicks the laburnum is just another tree.

The Laburnum Top

The laburnum top is silent, quite still

In the afternoon yellow September sunlight,

A few leaves yellowing, all its seeds fallen.

Till the goldfinch comes, with a twitching chirrup

A suddenness, a startlement, at a branch end.

Then sleek as a lizard, and alert, and abrupt,

She enters the thickness, and a machine starts up

Of chitterings, and a tremor of wings, and trillings--

The whole tree trembles and thrills.

It is the engine of her family.

She stokes it full, then flirts out to a branch-end

Showing her barred face identity mask

Then with eerie delicate whistle-chirrup whisperings

She launches away, towards the infinite

And the laburnum subsides to empty.

Stanza 1 (Lines 1-3)

It is the afternoon of a day in September. The sun is shining brightly. The poet sees a laburnum tree bathed in the yellow sunlight. The top of the tree is all silent. It is quite still. A few of the laburnum leaves are turning yellow. All its seeds have fallen to the ground. The poet here draws a lovely picture of a laburnum tree as it appears on an autumn afternoon. The poet uses 'yellow' to describe both, the leaves' colour and the sunlight. Over here, yellow represents silence, death and beauty. Thus, he uses this colour and describes the whole setting perfectly.

Stanza 2 (Lines 4-12)

The tree lies in silent state till a goldfinch comes there with a twitching chirrup. She suddenly and startingly perches at the end of a branch. Then very swiftly, abruptly and alertly, like a lizard, she enters the thickness of the tree. At once, the whole of her brood starts chittering. There is tremor of wings, trillings of the neslings. The whole tree comes to life and starts trembling with a thrill of pleasure. It is the young ones in the goldfinch's family who had woken up the tree alive. The mother feeds the chicks fully. Then she comes out to the end of a branch. Her face is partially covered with the stringed clusters of laburnum flowers hanging from the branches. This serves as her identity mask as she has become a part of the laburnum tree.

Stanza 3 (Lines 13-15)

After feeding the nestlings, the goldfinch comes out of the tree and flies away into the infinite sky. It makes sad, delicate, whistling chirps as it flies away. The laburnum once again comes to its previous state all silent and still. It seems as if it has become empty. 

In conclusion we can say that both the tree and the bird play an important role of nurturing in each other's life. In other words, it is the attitude of a person towards life that makes life meaningful and worth living.

Poetic Devices

1. Simile: Where one thing is compared to another by using the words 'like' or 'as'.

for e.g. 'Sleek as a lizard'.

2. Metaphor: Where a word/phrase represents something else.

for e.g. 'engine of her family'

Here engine represents the mother goldfinch, and machine represents the nest with its brood of bird chicks.

3. Alliteration: Where a number of words having the same first consonant sound occur close together in a series.

for e.g. 'September sunlight', 'A suddenness, a startlement' and 'tree trembles and thrills'

4. Assonance: Where a number of words having the same first vowel sound occur close together in a series.

for e.g. 'and alert and abrupt'.

5. Onomatopoeia: Where a word is formed from a sound similar to it.

for e.g. 'twitching chirrup', 'chitterings', 'trillings', 'whistle-chirrup'.

6. Transferred Epithet: Where a word is transferred from its place.

for e.g. 'her barred face identity mask'.

Symbolism: The bird 'Goldfinch' may stand for the soul and the 'tree' for the body. It is the entry of the soul in the body that brings the body to movement and when the soul departs, again there is lifelessness.

The Summer of the Beautiful White Horse

Even a Hardened Heart cannot resist Love

Once a rod was to be broken in two pieces. The Hammer was proud of its strength and said "With just a blow I'll break it into two". With that it raised its head and mercilessly fell upon the rod. But to its utter surprise, his head was hurled back, whereas there was hardly any change in the rod. It was the time for the Saw, who was also boastful of its relentless teeth. It said, "Ha! My gnashing teeth will cut the rod into two". With that its teeth went to and fro relentlessly. Soon, its teeth were worn out and being toothless it moved away glumly.

Then came forward the meek looking candle and said "Let me try". Both the Hammer and the Saw laughed at her minute demeanor. They were sure that where they have failed, this meek candle would fail utterly. But the candle bent on trying. She embraced the rod with her tiny flame and started giving her warmth. Slowly, the rod started melting and was separated into two parts.

Hence it is said that however hardened heart one may have, can't resist love.

The Summer of the Beautiful White Horse

Everyone of us, at some time or the other, fall prey to the evil side of our conscience and commit mistakes which could have serious repercussions on our future. We don't mend our ways until some amicable heart pricks our conscience and make us realize the mistake we were about to commit. 

The story 'The Summer of the Beautiful White Horse' deals with the theme of change of heart after being conscience-stricken. The chapter also deals with the child's perspective of stealing for fun as distinct from stealing for the purpose of making money.

The story is about two Armenian boys who belong to a tribe whose hallmarks were trust and honesty.

The story is narrated by a 9 yrs old Aram Garoghlanian, a member of an Armenian community living among the lush fruit orchards and vineyards of California.

Characters:-

    Mourad:- 13 Yrs old Armenian boy

    Aram:- 9 Yrs old Armenian boy

    Uncle Khosrove:-  Armenian, considered crazy by everyone

    John Byro:- An Assyrian farmer, owns the white horse

Summary:-

• Mourad's appearance at Aram's window with a beautiful white horse
• Aram couldn't believe what he saw as they belonged to a tribe which was leaving on the edge of town and were poverty stricken.
• According to Aram, "We never get enough money to keep us with food in our bellies."
• Moreover, the Garoghlanian family was proud first, honest next and believe in what was right and wrong.
• So, to believe that Mourad has stolen the horse was also hard to believe.
• Horse has a fascination for Aram when he says, "So magnificent...... so lovely... so exciting."
• Aram thinks stealing a horse for a ride is not same as stealing money.
• Aram leaps behind Mourad and they start to ride.
• Mourad starts roaring (singing loudly).
• Mourad is considered as a crazy member of the family, the natural descendant of Uncle Khosrove.
• Uncle KHosrove - furious in temper, irritable and impatient.
• Mourad is a fantastic rider as he can tame the wild running horse as he has a way with the horses.
• Aram wants to ride alone. But when he was riding, he was thrown away by the horse.
• After their early morning ride, they hid the horse in a deserted barn.
• Suddenly Aram realizes that Mourad has been keeping the horse for couple of weeks. As John Byro, as Assyrian farmer came searching for his lost horse.
• Uncle Khosrove gets irritated and roars "It's no harm, pay no attention to it."
• Aram rushes to Mourad to tell about the farmer and insists that they keep the horse till he learnt to ride.
• Mourad was tending a hurt wing of a robin. He says that they need to return the horse as this would bring the shame to the fame of the family.
• They were enjoying these early morning rides when one morning they ran into John Byro.
• John Byro inspects the horse and says that the horse is the twin of his horse.
• Next day, Mourad and Aram return the horse to John Byro's barn. There were dogs, but Mourad has a way with the dogs too.
• John Byro came in his surrey to tell that the horse has been returned and is well tempered too.
• Uncle Khosrove becomes too irritated and leaves.

TWO CONFLICTS IN THE STORY

One is between the boys and the farmer about the stolen horse which is resolved when the boys returned the horse.

Other is between John Byro and Uncle Khosrove about the different attitude towards life. This conflict can never be resolved.

JOHN BYRO - A CLEVER MAN

When he runs into two boys with a horse, he does not point out the horse is stolen from himself weeks ago even though he can swear that "Yet the horse is the twin of my horse." It is very surprising to us because there is a good chance for John Byro directly take his horse. But Byro respects the fame of the boys' family and does not dare to confront the fact.

UNCLE KHOSROVE

By using Uncle Khosrove's verbal ironies, the author wants us to pay attention to different values like: patriotism, identity or solidarity. He makes the point that the appreciation of life is more valuable than to prize the material things.

QUESTIONS:

1. "I could not believe what I saw", says the narrator. What was so unbelievable? Why?

2. Justify the statement "Mourad showed special concern for animals."

3. Discuss the significance of John Byro.

4. What makes the story interesting?

5. What message is conveyed through the story?

6. Did the boys return the horse because they were conscience-stricken or because they were afraid?

7. Give character sketches of Aram, Mourad and Uncle Khosrove.

We're not Afraid to Die... if We Can All Be Together by Gordon Cook and Alan East

 The story, ‘We’re Not afraid to Die-if We Can All Be Together’ is a story of extreme courage and skill exhibited by the narrator, his family and crewmen in a conflict with water and waves for survival. The episode shows that man can fight with nature if one is motivated. Man can do anything for the survival and for the family. the concept of 'never loose hope' reigns in the chapter.

Characters: 

The narrator: 37 yrs old businessman

Mary: his wife

Suzanne: their daughter, 7 yrs old

Jonathan: their son, 6 yrs old

Larry vigil: Crewman, An American

Herb Seigler: Crewman, A Swiss

Summary:-

Preparation for the voyage

The family dreamt of sailing in the wake of the famous explorer Captain James Cook. It was 3-4 yrs long journey plan. They spent their leisure time in honing their sea-faring skills. Their ship 'Wavewalker' was professionally built and they had spent hours fitting it out. They had even tested it in the roughest weather they could find.

First phase of the Journey (Plymouth to Cape Town)

In July 1976, they set sail from Plymouth, England. It was 105000 kms journey which passed pleasantly.

Second phase of the Journey (Cape Town to Australia)

150000 kms journey. They hired two experienced sailors – Larry Vigil, an American and Herb Seigler, a Swiss, to tackle one of the world’s roughest seas – the Southern Indian Ocean.

On the second day out of Cape Town, -they began to encounter strong gales.  On 25th December, the narrator's’s ship was in the southern Indian Ocean, 3500 kilometres to the east of Cape Town. The family celebrated their new year on board the ship. New year saw no improvement in the weather.

Caught in the storm

At dawn on January 2, the waves were so gigantic that compelled the sailors to slow their speed, drop storm jib and take other precautions. The danger was so obvious that the sailors completed life-raft drill, attached lifelines and life jackets.

Suddenly at 6 pm, a tremendous explosion shook the Wavewalker and the author was thrown overboard. The ship was about to capsize when another gigantic wave hit it tossing it upright once again. The author was thrown back onto the deck, his head and ribs smashed. In spite of his injuries, the narrator took charge of the situation. Somehow he found the wheel, lined up the stern for the next wave and hung on till Mary appeared and took charge of the wheel. 

Struggling with the storm

Larry and Herb started pumping out water like madmen. The whole starboard side bulged inwards. The narrator managed to cover canvas across the gaps to prevent water from entering the ship. Then came more problems. Their hand pumps stopped working and electric pumps short-circuited. Two hand pumps were wrenched overboard. Fortunately, the narrator found a spare electric pump under the chartroom that worked. The entire night was spent in pumping, steering, repairing and sending radio signals. Suzanne's head was hit and had swollen alarmingly. She even had a deep cut on her arm.

Searching for an island

With the damage that Wavewalker had sustained it was impossible for the ship to reach Australia so they needed to locate some nearby island. The narrator checked charts and calculated that Ile Amsterdam, a French scientific base was their only hope. 

Children's courage and Narrator's determination

Jon said that they were not afraid to die if they could all be together. Suzanne presented the narrator with a greeting card with a message to hope for the best. The narrator became more determined seeing his children’s courage. 

Night of despair

Their situation was again desperate on 5th Jan. They stopped the boat with the help of an improvised anchor. Faced the storm with the undamaged side of the boat. They waited throughout the night waiting for their end. 

A ray of hope

The narrator made rough estimate with spare compass which was not magnetically checked. He asked Larry to steer 185 degrees course to reach to the island. Finally, they reached lie Amsterdam, a volcanic island where they were welcomed by 28 inhabitants. 

Thus, the collective strength and never failing optimism of the sailors made it possible for them to come out of the jaws of death. Though Jonathan and Suzanne did not do anything to save Wavewalker but their courage, forbearance, faith and optimism gave extra strength and persistence to the narrator and his team. The bravery and unwavering support of the strong-willed children is noteworthy in the story.

Questions:-

1. How does the story suggest that optimism helps to endure the 'direst stress'?

2. How does the title justify the spirit of the story?

3. "Unity and Proper Plan can make impossible possible."- Discuss the statement with reference to the story.

4. 'Man is ever hungry of adventure'. Discuss with reference to the story.

A Photograph- Shirley Toulson

 A Photograph- Shirley Toulson

We can capture the glimpses of our past through photographs. Often when at later stage we look at such collection, we feel nostalgic about those days, we long for those days. Photographs become stark reality of our lives when we feel too much obsessed with them. We go through a lot of pain to overcome such memories. The theme of the poem is to show transient nature of human lives. Mutability is another theme of the poem. Sea is static whereas the human lives are liable to be changed.

The cardboard shows me how it was  
When the two girl cousins went paddling,

Each one holding one of my mother's hands,

And she the big girl - some twelve years or so.

All three stood still to smile through their hair

At the uncle with the camera. A sweet face,

My mother's, that was before I was born.

And the sea, which appears to have changed less,

Washed their terribly transient feet.

Some twenty- thirty - years later She'd laugh at the snapshot. " See Betty  

And Dolly," she'd say, "and look how they 

Dressed us for the beach." The sea holiday    

Was her past, mine is her laughter. Both wry 
With the laboured ease of loss.

Now she's been dead nearly as many years

As that girl lived. And of this circumstance

There is nothing to say at all.

Its silence silences.

                                                     

Stanza 1:- 

Cardboard- a stiff surface on which a photograph is pasted

Paddling- walking in shallow water bare footed

Big girl- eldest girl among the three

Transient- short-lived, temporary

Summary:- The speaker is looking at the photograph which describes her mother who is wading through water along with two cousins. Each cousin is holding either hand of the mother. She looks about twelve years old in the photograph. They are posing for the photograph and looking at the uncle with the camera. The mother has a sweet face. The photograph was taken when the speaking was yet to born. The sea water seems to wash their feet.

"Smile through their hair" - while they were getting ready with smiley faces for the photo, it was because of the breeze blowing that their hair were coming onto their faces.

And the sea, which appears to have changed less,

Washed their terribly transient feet.

The sea which symbolizes eternity is seen in contrast to the transient nature of human life. There is Contrast used in these lines. On the one hand we have eternal life of the sea as compared to the temporariness of the human life.

Stanza 2:-

wry- distorted 

Summary:- After some twenty-thirty years later, the mother would look at the photograph and laugh at the way the two cousins would get her ready for the sea holiday. Both have suffered a sense of loss and both the mother and the speaker cannot enjoy their pastime. 

Sea holiday was her past, mine is her laughter- the mother would enjoy her sea holiday which she couldn't enjoy perhaps after her marriage whereas the speaker used to enjoy her mother's laughter which she misses now as the mother is no more.

Both wry with the laboured ease of loss- 'Both' is referred to the mother's sea holiday and speaker's memory of mother's laughter. Both have suffered a loss hence its 'wry'. Perhaps the mother could not enjoy her sea holiday afterwards because of the constraints of married life. Perhaps the responsibility to look after the kids had fallen on her in absence of her husband and hence she was bereft of all the pleasure from her life. As the mother was striving hard to make both ends meet she could not laugh and so the speaker misses her mother's laughter.

Laboured ease of loss:- There is labour in the loss as it is really difficult for anybody to forget the sweet memories of the past and go on. There is ease in the loss as time acts as a healer. However the great pain may be, the intensity of the pain decreases with the time.

Stanza 3:-

Summary:- Now the mother has died as many years ago as that girl looked in the photograph. The death of the mother has left the speaker with no words. It's the silence that surrounds her.

this circumstance:- refers to the death of the mother

Its silence silences:-  The first 'silence' is referred to the death metaphorically. Wherever death prevails, there remains silence. It is the death (silence) of the mother that leaves the speaker without words (silences).

Critical Appreciation:-

The poem is divided in three stages:- 1. Mother's days of enjoyment when she was not married

2.Married life of the mother

3. Death of the mother

Poetic devices:

1. Contrast:- When the opposite ideas are brought together.

"And the sea which appears to have changed less,

Washedt theirterribly transient feet."

2. Transferred Epithet:- Epithet means word'

'terriblytransient feet' actual meaning is the feet which are terribly transient.

3. Alliteration:-  When the consonant sounds are repeated in a line. 

'stood still to smile' 'terribly transient' & 'Its silence silences'

4.Oxymoron:- a combination of contradictory words

                'laboured ease'

Why is the word Cardboard used in stead of 'photo frame'?

Cardboard denotes the withering away. The photo is not intact with a frame or glass. As the human life goes on withering in the same way the photograph which is pasted on a cardboard is withering away. It's change which is one of the themes of the poem hence the word cardboard is used.  

She the big girl:- see the irony that though in the photo she is the big girl and they are dominant in the photo, they couldn't sustain much. Sea is still there but not the mother.

The Portrait of a Lady - Khushwant Singh

Introduction:- 

We often share a strong bond of love and affection with our grandparents. They often turn out to be our best friends. But the urbanization saw rise of nuclear families and with that are perishing our strong bonds with our grandparents.

The author in the chapter "The Portrait of a Lady" depicts his strong bond as a child with his grandmother. The description is commonplace filled with livelihood and humour. The author touches upon the sentimental bond he shares with his grandmother and ends the chapter glumly but by leaving a strong effect on the mind's of the readers.

The author also describes the stark contrast we feel in the life in village as compared to the life in city, how city life, urbanization, modernization can leave the strong emotional bonds shaken.

'Portrait' generally means a painting or a photograph but here it implies the representation and impression of the grandmother.

Gist of the lesson:-

The author thinks that his grandmother was always old and wrinkled so does the grandfather in the portrait. His grandmother was always helpful, kind and compassionate not only to humans but to animals too. She would take care of the author in absence of his parents. Their relationship saw an upturn when they are shifted to the city where the author started to go to an English school. The grandmother did not revolt whereas she accepted the situation and took to feed to sparrows. She did not even show emotions when the author was going abroad. Even after the author's return after five years, he found the grandmother same old and wrinkled. It was in the exalted moment of home-coming of her grandchild that she exerted herself too much by singing and thumping a drum. The exertion took a toll on her as she was taken ill and did not recover. Her last breathe was in the chanting of the name of the almighty. After grandmother's death, when the family went out to arrange for the funeral, thousands of sparrows gathered around the corpse and paid their tribute to the grandmother.

Comprehension of the text:-

Grandfather's portrait:-

    - hung above the mantelpiece (place above the fireplace)

    - he wore big turban and loose-fitting clothes

    - his long, white beard covered his chest

    - he looked at least a hundred years old

    - looked a sort of person who could only have lots and lots of grandchildren.

Grandmother:-

    - had been old and wrinkled for the twenty years that the author had seen her.

    - children treated the stories of the games that grandmother played as a child as fables of the                      Prophets.

    - she was short, fat and slightly bent.

    - her face was full of wrinkles.

    - used to hobble about the house in spotless white  with one hand resting on her waist to balance her        stoop.

    - other hand would be busy counting the beads of a rosary.

    - while author would take his lessons, she would sit inside the temple reading scriptures.

Author and grandmother's relation in village:-

    - good friends

    - would get author up early in the morning and get him ready for school

    - while bathing him, she would say morning prayer in the hope that the author would learn it

    - would get his school bag ready

    - after breakfast of thick stale chapattis, they would start for the school

    - she would carry stale chapattis for the village dogs.

The village school:-

    - attached to the temple

    - village priest would teach them alphabets and morning prayer.

On the way back to home:-

    - village dogs would follow them

    - they would growl and fight for the chapattis

Turning point in the relationship of the author and the grandmother:-

    - shifted to city when author's parents comfortably settled there

    - author started going to English school in a motor bus

    - grandmother took to feed sparrows

    - grandmother felt helpless in aiding in author's study of English words, western science and learning

    - she thought there should be study of God

    - she disapproved of music lessons being taught to them.

    - when author was given a separate room, the common link of friendship was snapped.

Happiest moment of the day for grandmother:-

    - she would spend hours on spinning-wheel reciting prayers

    - in afternoon- would feed sparrows- hundreds of sparrows would come sit on her head, shoulder and       legs. she never shooed them away.

Author's departure for higher studies:-

    - author thought grandmother would be upset because he would be out for five years

    - he wasn't hoping to see her alive after his return

    - she did not show any emotion. her lips moved in prayer and mind lost in prayer

    - while bidding farewell, she kissed his forehead

    - author cherished the imprint as perhaps the last sign of physical contact between them.

Author's arrival after five years and grandmother's celebration:-

    - she looked the same

    - even had no time for words as she was busy in her prayers

    - she enjoyed feeding sparrows a little longer

    - change came over her in the evening

    - she gathered neighbouring women and started thumping an old drum and singing songs of home-          coming of warriors

    -exerted herself too much that family had to stop her.

Grandmother's end

    - next day, she was taken ill

    - just a mild fever, but she thought differently

    - she thought she had committed a sin by omitting to pray at the close of life

    - she did not speak to anybody but got busy in praying and counting the beads of rosary.

    - before anybody could suspect, a peaceful pallor spread over her face, she was dead.

Sparrows' last tribute to the grandmother:-

    - after mourning, the family went out to make arrangements for funeral

    - when they came back, they saw thousands of sparrows sat scattered on the floor without making             any noise

    -Author's mother brought bread and threw the bread crumbs to the sparrows but they took no notice          of the crumbs

    - they silently flew away when the corpse was carried away for cremation.

Additional Notes:-

Critical Appreciation:-

Children’s fancy about the people whom they have always found the same

    -Grandfather did not look the sort of person who would have a wife or children. He looked as if he could only have lots and lots of grandchildren.

-The thought that grandmother was once young and pretty was almost revolting

    -She often told us of the games she used to play as a child. That seemed quite absurd and undignified on her part and we treated it like the fables of the Prophets she used to tell us.

Was grandmother different or just another stereotype person?

    -We may assume that she was just a kind of other old people. She is highly religious, devoted, caring for her grandchild. She has distaste for the things taught at English school. She hated the music lessons being given to the students. Yes, she was indeed stereotype person who would keep stern stand against anything that was considered lewd at that time. We find old people to be adamant up to some extent. Grandmother seems adamant when she refused to believe that she would recover from her mild fever. She behaved just the way old people would behave when are ignored. She accepted her seclusion with resignation.

    -But yes, she was different in some aspects. She had love for animals, birds. She would carry a bundle of stale chapattis for the village dogs. In city, when she would feed sparrows, hundreds of sparrows would gather around her creating a veritable bedlam (real madhouse) of chirrupings. That used to be the happiest half-hour of the day for her. The sparrows mourned the death of the grandmother by assembling in thousands without making a noise (contrary to human beings who can’t suppress their talk in such situations also), they ignored the bread crumbs thrown at them and flew quietly  when grandmother’s corpse was carried off for cremation.

- She herself was not formally educated but was serious about her grandson's education. At village she would wake him up and get ready for school and even accompany him to school. In city, she felt helpless to aid him in his studies.

-She celebrated the home-coming of her grandson by beating sagging skins of the dilapidated drum and singing of the home-coming of the warriors. We may say that it was out of her sheer love for her grandson.

    -She could never have been pretty but she was always beautiful. Here the author talks about her inner beauty. Her physical appearance is compared to the winter landscape in the mountains as she would wear spotless white (as the widows would wear). Adding to that, she had silver locks.

    -But the author carries the notion so far to compare her inner beauty to “an expanse of pure white serenity breathing peace and contentment”. She was, at least for the author, an object of reverence and adoration.

Symbolism:-

    The line "The sun was setting and had lit her room and verandah with a golden blaze" shown that the grandmother has been given a place in the heaven. Golden colour which shows inner wisdom has a reverence in Sikhism as regards to Golden Temple. Blazing of room with golden light represents Almighty's grace being showered upon her.

तुला आठवायचाच बहाणा

तुझ्या आठवणी आठवून

मनोमनी हसू मज येते

( कसे सांगू सजने तुला)

 कधी मला न दिसल्यास

उदास किती हे मन होते.

तुझ्यापासून दूर राहण्याचा

किती मी प्रयत्न केला होता

(परंतु काय झाले माझे मलाच कळेना)

मन माझे तुझाच आढावा घेत

हा तुझ्या नजरेचा जादू होतं.

डोळे तुझे माझ्या डोळ्यांना मिळताच

मनात कसे तरंग उठायचे

(अहाहा! काय आल्हाददायक क्षण असायचा तो)

तुझ्या डोळ्यांशी लपवाछपवी करणे

मलाही फार फार आवडायचे.

तू सध्या एक कळी आहेस

तरीही सुगंध सर्वत्र दर्वळतेस

(सांगू कसे भोवरे किती आजूबाजूला)

मला तूच हवी असताना सुद्धा

तू मला अशी का जाळतेस?

मला असे सदैव पोळण्यात

तुझ्या ओठांवर सुंदर स्मित उमटते

(एका हास्याचेच दिवाणे आम्ही)

तुझे कोमळ हास्य बघितल्यावरच

माझ्या डोळ्यांचे पारणे फिटते.

तुझे हास्य ओठांवर न दिसता

मन माझे किती हुरहुरते

(तू सदैव हसत राहणारी कळी राहोस)

असे काही झाल्यास सखे

उदास किती मन हे होते.

मनाचे उदास होण्यास आता मी

कोणतेही, कसलेही दुःख समजत नाही

(तुला आठवायचा हा सर्व बहाणा)

सखे, तू मनात बसली असताना

तुझे माझ्याजवळ नसणे समजत नाही.

जी

माझे वडील आम्ही त्यांना जी म्हणायचो. दिसायला देखणे, इतर भावंडात उठून दिसणारे म्हणजे आमचे जी. माझ्या वडिलांनी कधी काही शौक बाळगलेला मला कधी आढळला नाही. कधीकाळी विडी ओढायचे म्हणे पण एके दिवशी आमचा मोठा भाऊ लहान असताना वडिलांनी फेकून दिलेले विडीचे थोटुक

नकल म्हणून तोंडाला लावले. तेव्हापासून वडिलांनी विडी ओढणेही सोडून दिले. माझे वडील इतर वाईट गोष्टींपासून दूरच राहिले. विचारी, सरस उलगडलेले व्यक्तिमत्व. त्यावेळेस जेव्हा महारांच्या पोरांना वरील जातीस मिळण्यास सुद्धा वाव नव्हता तेव्हा माझे वडीलांच्या यादीत बामण, कुणबी, वाणी इ. मित्रांचा समावेश होता. म्हणून माझे आजोबा म्हणायचे, "मोठ्याची संगत (माझे मोठे वडील) जुगारी, दारुड्या पोरांशी, लाह्याण्याची उन्हाळ, तापरट पोरांशी, पण मंडोटाची (वडील) बामना, तांब्याच्या पोरांशी."

जेमतेम पाचवी शिकलेले माझे वडील पण नाना विषयांवर जणू त्यांची घट्ट पकड. गावात त्यांना विशेष मान. बाहेर गावा कडील मंडळी कधी लग्नाला आली की बसायचे वडिलांना घेरून आणि चालायची विचारांची देवाण घेवाण. कधी वडील रामायणातील तर कधी इतर ग्रंथातील दाखले द्यायचे तेव्हा ऐकणारे मंत्रमुग्ध होत. जेव्हा कुणाच्या मरणावर स्मशानभूमी वर गेल्यावर शव गाळायला वेळ असल्यास वडीलांच्या व इतर पाहुणे मंडळी, गावकरी यांच्या गप्पा रंगायच्या. विचारांची इतंभूत सरणी.

वडील शाहिरही होते. त्यांना गण पाठ, सवाल- जवाब मध्ये वरदहस्त. पण त्यांनी हे कधीचेच सोडून दिलेले. माझ्या प्रत्यक्षात एकदा त्यांना सवाल जवाबात बक्षीस मिळालेले मी बघितले आहे.

वडिलांची ओळख राजनेच्यांशीही होती पण त्यांनी त्याचा गैरफायदा घेतला नाही. रा. सू. गवई साहेबांसाठी तर म्हणे खांद्यास खांदा लावून मदत केली होती. जेव्हाही मतदान आले तेव्हा राजकारणी मंडळी भलेही मग ती कोणत्याही पक्षाची असो आपसूकच वडिलांकडे हात जोडत यायच्या.

असो, ही गोष्ट तेव्हाची आहे जेव्हा घरची परिस्थिती जेमतेम होती. माझे मधले भाऊ यांनी अंडी विक्री चालू केली होती. शुक्रवारचा मोठा बाजार. खेड्यापाड्यातून येणाऱ्या लोकांसाठी घराच्या बाजूलाच अंडी घेऊन भाऊ बसलेला. आमचं घर रस्त्याच्या कडेलाच आहे. त्यावेळेस कशी तरी पोलीस स्टेशन ला खबर मिळाली की आमच्या गावात जेथे अंडी विकत आहेत तेथे त्या घरात मोहाची दारू सुद्धा विकणे चालू आहे. ही बातमी खरी होती पण ते घर आमचे नव्हते. साधारणतः शे दोनशे मीटरच्या अंतरावर अजून एक अंडीचे दुकान होते a तेथल्या घरात दारू मिळत असे. पण जे नव्हतं व्हायचं तेच झालं. काही शिपूर्डे येऊन सरळ घरात घुसले व मोरीत, टाक्यात त्यांनी शोधाशोध चालू केली. हा हा म्हणता म्हणता ही गोष्ट गावभर पसरली. इतरांसोबत माझे वडील घरी पोहोचले. पोलिसांच्या अनैतिक आचारमुळे लोकं त्यांना मारायला बघत होते पण वडिलांनी त्यांना रोखून धरले. चौकशी केली व गैरसमज दूर केला. पण कशे काय माहीत ही बातमी आमदारापर्यंत पोहोचली. लागलीच त्यांनी सब इन्स्पेक्टर ला फोन करून खळसावले व तडका फडकी त्यांची बदली करण्यात आली. अहिंसेची ताकद काय असते हे त्या क्षणी जाणले. जर का पोलिसांशी मारहाण झाली असती तर घटनेला वेगळेच वळण लागले असते. पण तो प्रसंगावधान वडीलांच्या अंगी वळणी होता.

जेव्हा समाजाने १९५६ साली बौद्ध धम्माची दीक्षा घेतली तेव्हा आजोबांनी सर्व देवी देवतांना नदीत विसर्जित केले व वडिलांनी स्वतःला समाजकार्यात ओवून टाकले.

आमचे गाव महाराष्ट्रात मध्य प्रदेशच्या सीमेपासून थोड्याफार अंतरावर आहे. आमची जास्तीत जास्त गोतावळ ही तिथलीच. त्यावेळेला तेथे आमच्या समाजाला छेडले जायचे. जेव्हा कुणी मेलेले ढोर उचलण्यास मना करायचे त्यांची हयगय केली जायची नाही. पण वडिलांनी काही सहकाऱ्यांच्या मदतीने तर कधी रिपब्लिकन पक्षाचे सहकार्याने मुलताई तालुक्यातील जवळ जवळ सर्वच गावात जाऊन समाजाचं मनोधैर्य खचू दिले नाही. कधी प्रशासनाची तर कधी पक्षाची साथ घेऊन जातीयतेला लढा देतच राहिले.

गावात तंटामुक्त समितीचे सभापती म्हणून त्यांनी गावाला तृतीय पारितोषिक मिळवून दिले. आम्ही आता कमावते झालो होतो. परिस्थिती सुधारलेली होती पण वडिलांची प्रकृति ढासळत चालली होती. आम्ही त्यांना म्हणायचो बास्स झालं आता आराम करा पण ते ऐकत नव्हते. वडिलांना आजूबाजूला इतर लोकं असले म्हणजे गमायचे. त्यांना गप्पा गोष्टी ची जणू आवडच. मग इतरांना कधी चहा पाणी, तर कधी पान सुपारी यासाठीही मागेपुढे बघायचे नाही. यावरून कित्येकदा तरी आई रागवायची. मला त्यांची ही सवय माहीत असल्याने जेव्हा कधी घरी यायचो तेव्हा त्यांच्या हातात चार पाचशे रुपये टाकून जात असो.

पण अचानक त्यांना पक्षाघाताचा झटका आला व त्यांनी अंथरूण धरले. त्यांच्या शेवटच्या क्षणी रात्री फोन आलेला की श्वास घेण्यास त्रास होत आहे पण आई सोबत हे पण म्हणाली की लगेचच निघू नकोस. कारण माझ्या पत्नीस आठवा महिना सुरू होता. म्हणून शेवटच्या दर्शनास मी मुकलो.

गावात ही धारणा की जर बायको गरोदर असताना नवऱ्याने कुणा मयतला खांदा दिला की बायकोचे बाळंतपणात फार हाल होते म्हणून कुणी मला वडीलांच्या मयतीला खांदा पण देऊ दिला नाही. त्या अंधश्रध्देच्या मी बळी पडलो होतो. त्याची साल, दुखः आजही जाणवते. वडिलांशी कित्येकदा भांडणारा, तर्क कु तर्क करणारा मी त्यांच्या मरणावर धाय मोलकून रडत होतो. छत गेलेलं वाटत होतं.

बऱ्याच दिवसांनी मध्य प्रदेशच्या एके गावी जाणे झाले. तेथे काही जुन्या वडीलधारी मंडळींनी माझी विचारपूस केली. वडिलांचे नाव सांगताच ते म्हणाले, "अगा हे नेताजी चं पोर हाय." नकळत कॉलर ताठ झाली. या जागतिक पिता दिनास त्या नेताजींना कोटी कोटी वंदन.🙏🙏🙏

अहेर

जगाच्या मोहपाशात

गुंग झालेला मनुष्य 

धकाधकीच्या दैनंदिनीत

कुंठीत काढतोय आपले आयुष्य.

आशा आहे सुखाची

पण आहेत सर्व दिवास्वप्न

दिवास्वप्नही पूर्ण होऊ शकते

पण वाट आहे ही हावरटपणाची,

आजकाल मनुष्य कमी श्रमात

जास्त पैसा कमाऊ पाहतोय

म्हणूनच गुन्हेगारीच्या दलदलीत 

तो आकंठ डुंबत जातोय.

परतीचे सर्व मार्ग बंद असून

वर तालेही ठोकले असतात

वेळप्रसंगी स्वतःलाच ते

खोटे ठरविण्यास ही धजत नसतात.

शेवटी 'अजेय' मृत्युलाच काढावे लागते बाहेर

व हाच असतो या आयुष्याने त्यांना दिलेला 'अहेर'.

O God! Save me this time...

For a school going child, homework could be a burlesque task. It was rather horrifying in the previous century. Teachers would be a hard nut to crack and often physical punishment used to be resorted to for not completing homework.

Contrary to that, students nowadays have at least the luxury of not being physically tortured and moreover they have a lot of technology at their aid to do homework.

There used to be no respite for the students studying in Navodayas as we used to be under a constant watch of our teachers. If you want to escape the punishment for a day, you have to feign sickness. Well, that too when the Nurse madam gets convinced.

Dispensary used to be an integral part of our Navodaya life. Whenever being injured or not feeling well as well when not wanting to go to school, rush to the dispensary. Even sometimes when we would need extra breakfast, we would rush to madam with some ailment and tell her that we hadn't had breakfast. then she would write a slip to the mess "Bread n Milk". (Some of the students had even perfected her writing style and signature that even madam wouldn't recognize the slips written by these experts.)

It was the day when we were asked to complete a very important assignment (subject I don't know precisely). I obviously had not completed the assignment due to inability of getting the content or lack of resources to complete the assignment. That made me feel afraid of going to school that day so I tried to stay back at hostel feigning sick. I wasn't an expert in pretending sick as Prafful or Anuj (our leaders in acting) were. So I dared not go to dispensary lest madam would send me to school. Thus I ended up remaining at the hostel unnoticed by anybody. Hostel channel gates would get closed at 8:30 a.m. When the gates were locked I came out of my hiding place, did some assignment and then amazingly dozed off. I didn't know how much did I sleep but suddenly I was woken up by one of the guards Mr. Ingole.

You must know about Mr. Ingole. He was a favourite with the teachers but a nightmare for the children. he would even many times make us feel ashamed with his banter. We would particularly try to avoid him, being as simple as we would pretend to be. Seniors were rather well acquainted with him.

Well, when I was woken up, I pretended illness to which he replied that I had been called to school by our Class Teacher. I was in dread of being reprimanded before everybody but anyhow I had to get out of the hostel so I dressed up, got some books and started for the school. There was plantation around the school and one could easily hide in that plantation. The thought flashed in my mind and instead of approaching the school my feet started towards that plantation area. After finding some bushes, I rested myself but the thought that somebody will come seeking me wouldn't leave my mind. I thought of getting out of the school boundary. There was barbed wire around the school campus so it was quitee possible to slick between the gap of those wires and get out.

Outside there was the village area and some barren land where corpses used to be cremated (It is being told that every Navodaya is built on some crematorium, I hadn't done the fact check). There was a temple beside the campus boundary. That was an ideal place to be safe because I knew that nobody would come looking for me there. But what about the class teacher? Won't I be caught the next day? These thought wouldn't leave me at all so I started praying "Oh God! Please save me this time. I won't skip the school intentionally." I wanted that my prayer should be heard I should be spared.

When the school got over, I came out of the temple and anyhow reached the hostel. When I asked one of the friends what was our class teacher asking about me, he told that he had given her information that I was sick and resting and nobody did ask for me afterwards. At last.... at last, I realised that it was a bluff that Mr. Ingole told me. But then also I thanked God for saving me. I had hearty lunch and rested for a while brooding along side that I wouldn't skip the school again.

Holi Holiday in our Haven--Navodaya

Holi had always been a fascinating and most awaited festival in Navodaya Vidyalayas. Every Navodayan, me without being an exception, would love to have old-time from school. Mr. A. K. Trivedi was our principal then, having an aura around him by dint of his personality and more because of his foreign return status(May be from America, I don't remember distinctly now).
He used to fancy a kind of French beard. To touch Sir's beard and caress it was our unattained dream, most awaited yet out of reach.

Well, Holi was the festival that was just fetching our dreams in daylight realm. We would perhaps be touching his beard in an excuse of smearing his face with 'Gulaal'.

That morning saw us woken up early in our dormitory. Some intelligent brats were busy preparing "Bura na maano, Holi hai" placards/ charts with our nicknames of every Tom, Dick annd Harry from our room. These charts then were to be pasted on a small electric box as it was en route of girls' way to mess. (Adolescents behaviour as usual)😊

Breakfast saw us all in motley clothes, all geared up to play Holi. Some smart chaps would even point out some girls smiling and gossiping among themselves perhaps after reading our weird nicknames. (As such we thought so).

After breakfast, we started for our house master C.T. Joshi Sir's quarter whose skin was quite allergic to artificial colours. (Thus he had told us.. may be wanted to ditch us away). Well, Indians (more precisely the Navodayans) are adept in preparing such colours as would not easily be washed away. So these scientists had put in all their expertise in inventing such colours the previous night.

There was a bit worry mixed with a lot of exuberance as we paced towards Principal's quarter. Principal was too happy to receive us and happily enjoyed our fidgeting his (itchy🤑) beard. Well, God always grants to children's prayers. We had touched the Parian sea.

Next few hours flew by in enjoying Holi. Almost everyone was out of colours but then real Holi started when pupils started pushing and pulling each other in muddy puddle. Slipping, squatting, racing in mud soon became favourite game.

There was a pool of overflow water near water tank. It used to be deserted on other days, but now it was busy bees' hive. Gathering around the pool, everybody started jumping, paddling in that pool. The pool was rather 12-15 ft long, 6-8 ft wide and 8-10 ft deep. Within a few moments the water was dark brown as chocolate.

I was simply sitting on the edge of the pool watching other guys enjoying. I hardly had been in water for swimming earlier. I didn't know swimming then. (To be honest, still I learnt the ABC of swimming. But I am an expert swimmer atleast in my dreams in which I have followed the footsteps of many).  I had a desire to get in water. Rather the water was pulling me.

At last I dared to enter the pool. Holding onto the edge of the pool, I started thrashing water with my legs. I was amused first, curious next. I wanted to put my head under water. I tried once while holding onto the edge, and the thrill took me over. I tried a few more times but unfortunately for me, the edges were all slippery because of all jumping, diving, dragging. With the next holy dip my grip loosened and at once I started downward. Literally I was blind as water was too dirty to see through. To add to misery, pupils like me who weren't swimming, were ignorant part.

Thank heavens that as I was groping for something, my hands held onto a cement pipe which was in that corner submerged. That pipe came to my rescue and pulled me out of that quagmire. But alas! Some chocolaty water had entered my right ear and I had to bear the pain for 3-4 days.

Though there is the inert desire and intensity to learn swimming, hardly had I ventured in pool or water afterwards. The Holi holiday's holy dip had pushed my desire further deep in the burrow of my heart.